Tuesday, August 28, 2007

life's lessons..(yee haw...alliteration at last!!)

1. a male homo sapien clearly resembles a sow ( male pig) in its attitude embedded with oodles of chauvinism, bordering on being called a zealot.

2. a female homo sapien, although logically has to resemble a swine in its attitude, paradoxically is more related to a female dog( am evading the usage of exact term. i condemn the usage of profainity in my blog space :D). she is highly prone vicissitudes and prudery as far as her behaviour is concerned in the presence of a male.

3. the union of the above mentioned species results in pristine angels with a beatific minds, which in the later stages of their lives get polluted due to their environment and their peers. these offsprings then transmute into the sows or b*****es depending on their sexual orientation.

4. those individuals with the most maximum sadistic disposition become lab assistants in engineering laboratories, especially the elec labs.

5. however enticing a person might seem initially,nnnnnnnnnnnever...mind u... never ever get into a relationship without a prior courtship period of a minimum of 6 to 8 months. donot befriend ppl from online sites n trust them so much that they get to influence you.

6. try to invent a waterproof cell phone as soon as possible in the near future because, the phone actually starts ringing the moment u get into the bath.

7. ur seamster/seamstress will end up destroying only those dress materials which would cost you an arm and a leg. donot castigate them, they are after all average homo sapiens.

8. have one person in life on whom u can lean on, everytime there is a crisis. have another substitute down the sleeve too...who knows, what if both of u end up needing a comfi shoulder at the same time, the substi might help.

9. donot smoke or drink. they are known to kill you early. that can be very dangerous. who is going to live all the while to educate the spouse on hell and its related features and teach the kids tarzan acts???

10. meet ur school pals atleast once in 3 or 4 years. that will give you an idea about how much you have grown... both in the bank balance details and around the waist.

11. donot rub your suggestions on the children. let them decide their own destiny. who knows, u might end up influencing them if u lend them a piece of ur mind. biiiiiiiiig disaster!!! they might end up being nincompoops just like u..!!!!

12. tell ur loved ones how much u care for them. express ur love by letting them do petty chores for u ( in the case of women, u might let ur husbands do the dishes, wash the linen, press the and ur legs and bathe the kids often...might help..:P).

and the unlucky
13. this one has a lot of truth in it.
nothing that occurs in ur life is the result of ur efforts. life just happens to u...n u happen to live it. the dunderheads watch it passing by...n stare. the slightly clever ones...take the ride..

have fun...